


Sales

by spikewriter



Series: Word of the Day Ficelets [17]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Gen, Retail Sales Hell, word of the day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-29
Updated: 2014-12-29
Packaged: 2018-03-03 22:11:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2889758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spikewriter/pseuds/spikewriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Do not eat the customers. Do not eat the customers..."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sales

**Author's Note:**

> This is part of my "Word of the Day" series, and was originally posted January 1, 2005. Set in the Magic Box series, this snippet seems appropriate to the time of year and Spike's experience with that particular circle of hell known as After-Christmas Sales.

**transmute** \trans-MYOOT; tranz-\, _transitive verb_ :  
To change from one nature, form, substance, or state into another; to transform.

_intransitive verb:_  
To undergo transmutation.

_Transmute_ is from Latin _transmutare_ , "to change utterly," from _trans_ -, "across" + _mutare_ , "to change."

***

_Do not eat the customers. Do not eat the customers. Do not eat the customers -- no matter how crazy they make you._

Why hadn't Giles warned him about the insanity of the after-Christmas sales? Why hadn't he said a word about the hordes of customers who, faced with the prospect of a bargain, transmuted from semi-rational human beings to ravening hordes. In his time, Spike had seen villagers with torches and pitchforks that were better behaved. At least, that was his story and he was sticking to it.

As he dealt with the UC Sunnydale Wicca group who were asking the most inane questions about whether or not the ritual candles the shop sold were 'earth-friendly' -- whatever the hell that meant -- he was aware of Buffy and Tara managing the register, and Dawn moving around the floor, answering what questions she could, while Giles dealt with a couple who were serious buyers for some of the more esoteric materials. The girls had talked at one point about taking a long lunch to check out some of the other sales while Spike and Giles held down the fort, but any chance of that had long since disappeared. Today it was all hands on deck.

"You're positive these aren't manufactured by a big, soulless corporation? I mean, we really would prefer to use something that's more natural to represent the Women Power that we are trying to tap into as daughters of Hecate." The girls around the speaker all nodded, adding their own comments about taking back the night and rejecting outdated patriarchal modes. Hard to believe Tara had ever sunk so low as to hang out with this lot.

Spike was about to open his mouth to ask whether or not they were going to buy the damn things when Anya interjected, "Of course I understand your concerns. The intent with which the candle was made has a great impact on the efficacy of the ritual itself. I think perhaps you might prefer this line of candles, which are hand-crafted by a small coven in Canada..."

As she led the women away to a display that was twice the price even on sale, she looked back over her shoulder and said, "Sorry I couldn't get here earlier," barely missing a beat in her sales pitch.

The cavalry had arrived. They might have a chance of getting through this after all.


End file.
